Silos

Isolation caught me once again 

I’m too vulnerable alone 

I’m fragile & weak on my own 

Every-time I’m alone I fall

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So many people around me 

Yet I feel so lonely 

Too many burdens 

I feel no one would understand 

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I don’t want to be judged 

I don’t want you to loose hope

So I choose to struggle alone 

Steady fighting shame and condemnation 

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I don’t have a problem seeking help

But I’m not proud of repetitive actions 

Everytime I fall

I’m reminded I go only go fast alone.

If I’ll go far, I’ll need people. 

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Accountability sounds cool

when I’m being theoretical 

In practice I’m just tired.

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Lust lurks  in the corners 

When I think I’m over it 

It ambushes me in silos.